“You are never upset for the reasons you think.” This sentence caught my attention many years ago and has not left me. It serves as a frequent remind whenever I get attached to my righteous indignation, my zeal for a particular cause, my dismissal of another person’s cause, my impatience or anger at someone.

This sentence reminds me that whenever I get upset about something on one occasion, but not on another occasion, it’s not the thing I am upset about. Whenever my emotion is disproportionate to the moment, I am not upset for the reason I think.

through my own eyesI never see the world as it is. I see the world as I am. I see the world I have created. I see my experiences, other people, my past, present, and future through my own eyes and my own history, and there is very little objectivity in that, despite how objective or smart I think I am.

The world does not conspire to make me miserable. I can do that to myself just fine, thank you very much. But it is only by sitting still, by allowing my mind to slow down and stop contriving the circumstances around me, that I can see that I am fabricating most of my misery.

I am never upset for the reasons I think. It is my responsibility to be still long enough and often enough to see that. Only then will next steps become clearer.